Healing

Healing comes in time.

I've heard this from day one of miscarrying. As my heart was breaking I thought, "How can time take away the over whelming feeling of sadness and hopelessness?" I was apart of some support groups on facebook and some of these women are suffering so horrible many years later. As the weeks past and I was seeking the Lord for answers, peace, and hope I noticed myself healing VERY little at a time.

I wondered why these ladies were so distraught. I noticed many of them angry at God. Or maybe were not religious at all. As I was trying to seek the Lord everyday and not be tempted to drown in depression I had to with drawl from these groups.  Not because I was passing judgement, their grief was their own. But for my sanity I withdrew.

I reached out to these women. And said I was praying for them. But this particular group was more of women just rehashing the ordeal or being mad at others for not understanding. There wasn't any healing. My heart broke for them.

When something bad happens in life we tend to question "Why me?" Well I ask "Why not you?"

Through life we go through storms and some tough stuff. But we are not promised that this road of life is easy in fact Jesus told his disciples in Matthew 10 that were going to be tortured for God. They would be hated and family would turn against family. These were the very men and women who literally walked with Jesus in the flesh. Are we better then them that we think we must suffer nothing?

I won't pretend to even understand a infinite mind with my finite one. God is the beginning and the end. He knows all.

1 Corinthians 2:9
However, as it is written:
“What no eye has seen,
    what no ear has heard,
and what no human mind has conceived”[a]
    the things God has prepared for those who love him—(A)


Which is why I surrendered my baby into his hands and said your will be done. May our loss bring you Glory!

Our culture is about what I want? Its a selfish culture. Servanthood and graciousness is not taught among the people of this world. Non- Christians and Christians get so angry when they suffer and get mad at God for allowing things to happen. Yet we forget the suffering of the early church. We get mad because we don't have the nicest car.

I did not want to stay in the darkness of my grief. Was it easy? No. Do I miss my baby everyday? Yes.

But I love and trust the Lord to know there is a plan in this. There is a purpose.

A dear friend of mine said something to me that I repeat often "God does not waste our pain"

Peter was crucified up-side down because of his beliefs.


1 Peter 4:12 
"12 Beloved, do not be surprised at (A)the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice (B)insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad (C)when his glory is revealed. 14 (D)If you are insulted (E)for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory[a] and of God rests upon you. 15 But (F)let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or an evildoer or (G)as a meddler. 16 Yet (H)if anyone suffers as a (I)Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God (J)in that name. 17 For it is time for judgment (K)to begin at the household of God; and (L)if it begins with us, what will be the outcome for those who (M)do not obey the gospel of God? 18 And

(N)“If the righteous is scarcely saved,
    what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?”[b]
19 Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will (O)entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good."
Peter was crucified up-side down because of his beliefs. 

3 months ago tomorrow I lost my baby. I miss her everyday. My heart always has an empty spot. But I rest in the arms of my savior. I pray that these women I've met find this peace that only Christ can give them. I will see my baby again in Heaven. 
She served her purpose, through her death there will be Glory unto God. 

If you don't know, know that I'm here to listen. To be your friend. I know God has put this on my heart for a reason. I'm humbled by his greatness. 

Until tomorrow :) Happy Blogging!

Comments

  1. So inspiring! I thank God for bloggers like you. God is already using you for His glory!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think your outlook on why not me is such a healthy way of looking at things. I can't say that I wouldn't be one of the ones asking why me??? I remember as a 10 year old cursing God for taking my little sister away, the baby my mom and I had daydreamed about for months. I honestly think I lost my faith that day and I still don't have it back.

    People like you really do amaze me. I wish I had that type of conviction and outlook on things.

    ReplyDelete

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