Wednesday, October 31, 2012

What I'm Loving Wednesday!

Linking up with Jamie

I'm Loving that tomorrow I get to see O and E!! 
Are they not the cutest ever!?
I'm Loving that I get to see my BFF soon!

I'm Loving that its cold outside! 

I'm Loving that the weekend is just around the corner!

I'm Loving that I will be apart of the puppet ministry again! Its so fun!

I'm Loving Hope

I'm Loving my Josh (thumbs-up)

As always I'm Loving my Jesus!! 

Happy Blogging!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012



Webster defines them as:

1. a obsolete : disturbance
b : excitement
a : the affective aspect of consciousness : feeling
b : a state of feeling
c : a conscious mental reaction (as anger or fear) subjectively experienced as strong feeling usually directed toward a specific object and typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body

The thing about emotions is that they are not always rational. In fact sometimes we do not even know why we are feeling the emotion we are feeling? Can I get an AMEN from the women!? HA!

You ladies know what I'm talking about.

Even when we are not suffering Eve's curse we still are emotional creatures.

Living by our emotions and letting them dictate they way we behave or think.... Could have some serious consequences.

Sometimes our emotions are fleeting, actually they are mostly always fleeting.  We might be so angry but something will happen - in my case Josh will make a corny joke and I'll smile. The anger slips away.

Yesterday was a battle. I started out my day in the word and doing some studying. I've been fighting against overwhelming emotions for about a week now. After the balloon release for Hope I thought maybe it would bring more healing... or bring closure. Or maybe I believed I wouldn't be sad anymore.

The truth is.. That honestly I feel more raw. Probably because I showed the pain of the depths of my soul. I was vulnerable. I could go all "psychology student" on you but I won't. Because honestly I know I'm fighting not only a mental battle but a spiritual one as well. The balloon release did heal... just not how I thought it would...

If I allowed my anger, hurt, disappointment, pain dictate my life I would be a sad sight.

Do I get upset/hurt/broken hearted at seeing pregnancy announcements, birth announcements, babies... YOU BET. My heart aches something fierce.

However, I know that through this pain I am growing. I know that the enemy does not want to see me be joyful. He is out to steal, Kill, and destroy...

John 10:10
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

You see Jesus was saying here that he came so that I may have a life full...not emptiness and sadness.

I can not let my emotions rule me... I must hold on to the truth that God has given me.

Jeremiah 29:11-14
11For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 14I will be found by you,” declares theLord, “and will bring you back from captivity.b I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”
2 Peter 1:5-9
For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. For whoever lacks these qualities is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins.

This isn't a easy task to have self control, to be steadfast... I lost my baby. My heart breaks. But my God is bigger then I in ALL things. I will.... No, I MUST hold on to his word and his promises.

When I get to Heaven and see my little Hope it will the most glorious thing... this is not the end.

So be encouraged my friends... hold fast to the Lord. He is the only truth, way, and peace.

Until Tomorrow...

Monday, October 29, 2012

Coffee! Please! & 200th Post

Anyone who knows me well knows I am not a morning person. I love my sleep... I have my whole life.

My mom has plenty of stories of  school days where it took her a hour or more to get me up. I just refused some mornings. Even with consequneces I didn't care. LOL

Of course now if I don't get up it would mean getting fired or hubby getting fired! :) 

Speaking of hubby--- today is his first day in his new promotion! Which is awesome right? Except that I had to get up almost 2 hours early... 

You see we share one car (hopefully changing that soon) and so we always are maneuvering our schedules and the car. 

SO, right now I need some coffee! Oh how I wish I could get to a Startbucks®

LOVE that place... mocha frappuccino vente  

But alas I will not be making it there today. However the office does have a coffee maker. Now if I can just figure out how to use it... :) 

This weekend was great... except I did something to my back and it is hurting so bad!

It was probably all the cleaning I did... oh by the way. I actually stayed home ALL day Saturday! It was one of those days that the dust bunnies were scceeerrred... 

Well, I can't hardly keep my eyes open... going... to...find...some...coffeeeee....zzzzzzz

and by the way this is my 200th Post!!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Friday Letters


Dear week, You have gone so slow. 

Dear Pixel, You have been a good girl. You may not have to find a new home

Dear blog buddies, Did I tell you about my pink cape? 

Dear J, You are so sweet and I'm so proud of you my love!

Dear O, E, and J - I think that Lala and Joshy need to kidnap you for a weekend! How fun would that be?

Dear Abby, you were so cute acting all spunky in your old age! 

Dear weather, please stay Fall! I'm tired of being hot!

Dear Josh, just another note to say  I love you!

Dear God, You continually amaze me! Thank you for loving me despite my self. 

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Lips Un-sealed

OK remember this post about my Lips Sealed.... Well 

Josh got a promotion!! Yay! Way to go hubby! He deserves it... We have been praying and leaving it in Gods hands. We are truly thankful!

He is so smart, generous, loving, kind, wonderful... I can't help to brag on him!! 

Look at the cute smile!! Love you babe! So proud of you!! 

So until tomorrow... 

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Don't leave me this way...

I'm going to write whats on my heart... 

I'm praying the Lord leads me on what to say. By the way he does have an opinion on everything we do. Not just the BIG stuff, but our daily life. 

I am tired of being the same. I'm tired of being the same Lauren inside. I want better. I want God to change my heart to be more like his. 

I love the song Hillsong sings: 

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me

Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

This should be our heart. Crying out to him. 

Honestly, I'm tired of me. I'm tired of the same issues I continue to struggle with. I want to MOVE ON. 

I'm going to be real with you. 

I'm tired of being filled with anxiety about money. 
I'm tired of feeling guilty because I say "No". 
I'm tired of my selfishness. 
I'm tired of my victim mentality. 
I'm tired of being fearful of being hurt. 

We say we want change but we make no effort. We live our life ignore the one who loves us the most. He isn't allowed in our daily life! 

I was feeling so discontented last night. I realized I had not done my devotional or prayed. Shame on me for ignoring the living God all day while he waiting for me to commune with him. He wants a relationship with us. He is with me through out my days and he doesn't have to be. 

He love me freely. I've done NOTHING to earn his love. He just loves me. 

Living in his presence is not easy, it makes you look at your life through his word, being requires you to be unselfish... Thats hard. We have been programed to be just that, Selfish. 

In everything I showed you that by working hard in this manner you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.' Act 20:35

I'm working on me... the first thing I'm working on is my daily devotions.. being in his presence and setting up a discipline for my self to set a time to read his word, meditate , and pray. 

What is God doing in your life? 
What ways can you change? 

This is a beautiful song 

Monday, October 22, 2012

Flat Tires, Fishes, and Corn Mazes

What a random title right??

As mentioned in my Friday Letters Saturday we were taking my niece and nephew to the aquarium. Well because we were leaving in the afternoon we knew traffic was going to be bad. So we got some local's directions to a short cut. Well this short cut involved some very windy roads!

So as Josh and I are talking, the kids are asleep and so is their daddy :) we hear

thump thump thump...

Yep, a flat tire on a narrow 2 lane road in the mountains. With two babies in the car.

Josh and my bro jump out only to find that my dad has a vital part to our carjack. So while trying to debate if it was safe to wave someone brother tries to use various tools to do the job... it didn't work. So we wave someone down... They have a carjack! YAY!

So what should have been an hour to hour 1/2 ended up being around a two hour car trip! But we made it! I'm so thankful for a donut and those two nice ladies.

The aquarium was so much fun...

Sunday we went to Oaks Farms... There was so much to do! We walked one side of the corn maze. Made it to all the check points. Then I went to build some sand castles with O and E. While Josh went back through the other side of the corn maze.. Hayrides.... junk food.. line to the women's bathroom.. (smile)

Until tomorrow Happy Blogging!!

Friday, October 19, 2012

Friday Letters!!


Dear Blog friends, I know I promised at post on Titanic and I will get to it. Studying yesterday took up my whole day...

Dear J, I think your pretty cute!

Dear Hope, Monday was amazing. Mommy feels so happy that we got to honor you. 

Dear O and E, Get ready for some FUN time at the aqaulorium (as O says it) tomorrow!! 

Dear God, Thank you for renewing my soul! 

Dear new shoes (that look like toms but are actually from wally world), I Love you! 

Dear Social Psych, I'm going to miss you. These classes fly by :)

Dear J, I love you!

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Birthday Fun!

On our to Titanic
Yes, I am 27 ... Honestly I woke up Monday morning and felt different. There are just some birthdays you feel that way... At least I have!

My birthday weekend was amazing. And of course you know my hubby is the sweetest! So Saturday our church hosted pastors wives, women leaders, and ect for a couple hours of encouragement and some other fun stuff. Remember me talking about a special surprise that was being worked on for the retreat... Well because prayer lasted for a while no one was able to see our surprise. So this Saturday our assoctiate Pastor asked if we would like to surprise the ladies of this event.

Uh... YES!!

Meet Me At The Fair
This was our table... We had so much fun!! That is my lovely mother to the right and on of closest friends with me. There were other tables... (there were beautiful!)

Pink Candy Table

Let the River Flow
Are these not beautiful! These table teams did a great job! The ladies who were attending the event just giggled when they seen all this! It was such a blessing to see them blessed :)

After we went to the Titanic Museum in Pigeon Forge, TN. LOVE LOVE LOVE that place!

It was so great! I'm going to post pics tomorrow of that. The Titanic deserves its own post :)

Sunday went to dinner with my in-laws... Where my mom-in-law INSISTED that I was sung to :) Whats a birthday without being embarrassed. For some reason Josh didn't take video...Oh well. Just use your imagination.

Then we actually went home.. And did nothing. My intent was to work on school work (which I should be doing right now). Then we went to get the rocks for Hope's balloon release. Then to Wally World :) Where Josh disapeared and kept calling me asking where I was. He was birthday shopping :)

We got home and he had bought me a cake!!

It was yummy!! He then gave my half of my present 2 canvas to paint on... Yes I paint... I love to paint. He said that he wanted me to have something to help me destress... He is so thoughtful... Have I mentioned that I'm pretty crazy about him? 

Monday morning he gave my second present 3 smaller canvas :D Love him!

Then I had my birthday lunch with some of my family... Which included one of my most favorite people in the world.... (get ready for a photo bomb) 

My cuz Jessica! She lives in another city for school so seeing her on my bday was AWESOME!!

Love my mom!

My birthday bunt cake :)

Gosh I love my grandparents!! 

I Love Love Love these pics! (L to R ) Jessica, my youngest cousin - Maddie, and my aunt Shell

This is also Jess's niece.. I love seeing them together! It reminds me of O and I.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Hope's Balloon Release

What a great day... Yesterday was so emotional but yet I feel stronger. We shared our testimony and read scriptures..

Jeremiah 29:11-14

11 For I know the (A)plans that I [a]have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for (B)welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a (C)hope.12 Then you will (D)call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will (E)listen to you. 13 You will (F)seek Me and find Me when you (G)search for Me with all your heart. 14 I will be (H)found by you,’ declares the Lord, ‘and I will (I)restore your [b]fortunes and will (J)gather you from all the nations and from all the places where I have driven you,’ declares the Lord, ‘and I will (K)bring you back to the place from where I sent you into exile.’

I Love this scripture. God has a plan through our pain... and that is a plan for welfare and a future of HOPE. We can rest in knowing we were going through the hard times that are meant for growth that he will bring us out , but we will be better.

Josh read Romans 15:13

13 Now may the God of hope fill you with all (A)joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope (B)by the power of the Holy Spirit.

He WILL fill us with joy and peace. Then we may abound in Hope.

We set our table. Put our Hope rocks that Josh and I made. As a reminder of our little Hope and in memory... And to remind us that God is hope, not matter what situation we face. He is our Hope, Strength, Peace. It was a beautiful event. Something I will never forget. Something I will treasure in my heart always.