Showing posts from December, 2016

Is this the answer?

My last post was not a happy one or really all that joyful was it?

When I wrote No Answers I was in a rough place.

This has been a trying year. A year of death, loss, trial after trial.

At one point we owned three cars and not one was dependable. It was like a comedy and we were the punch line.

Honestly with December came this feeling of hopelessness.

I felt desperate to feel some sort of soothing balm to my open wounds.

I have seen my sweet cousin lose her husband, Brian. 

A young woman who was 25 die of cancer leaving three young children behind.

We lost a pillar of our church, a man well into his nineties. He was and is dearly loved.

A little child burned

Children taken from their mother

My sweet husband has lost two aunts and an uncle this year....

My sister was in a car accident and if not for the wonder of Doctors would have been permanently paralyzed...

We lost our Little Bit, and a few months earlier a cousin lost her baby

I know I am not alone in saying 2016 has been a rough …

No Answers

Last year around August I started bringing up the subject about having another baby.

At first Josh was not keen on the idea. For several reason, those are not mine to share. When January came around so did Josh.

We decided after an appointment with our Dr that we would try to get pregnant.

We did. Then we lost our baby.

I write this because I really pray for God's guidance in my life.

Yes, I am one of those people... I actually believe God cares about my life and my decisions. And he has something to say about them too.

I have been trying to do my devotional every morning before Ethan wakes up. I'm usually successful in finishing praying.

I really felt like God wanted us to try again. And I really prayed hard.

We went through so much with Ethan after he was born and I did NOT, let me express this again DID NOT want to have to go through that again. NO.

I was scared the entire time I was pregnant. Then after he was born, we almost lost him.

Today while I was fixing E breakfast …

Nine Years

Today I celebrate an answered prayer. 
I started to pray for my future spouse at fourteen. That may seem young to you and it was young. 
But from a very young age (obviously)  I dreamed of my prince feel those butterflies that all those romantic movies gave me with a real person. 
As I grew older I desperately wanted someone to love me... 
I wanted someone who would take care of me, who loved me for me.
Not what I could give them. 
I wrote about how Josh and I met and you can read all that HERE
Today it has been nine years that I said 'I do' to the Love of my life. 
We had a whirlwind romance and it swept us up and carried us quickly to the alter
Four months actually from our first date we were on our honeymoon. 
I know that there were naysayers, and I know that some had doubts. 
That is okay. 
Because Josh and I knew we were meant to be. We knew God put us together. 
We have went through some really tough stuff. 
We have lost jobs... friends... our babies...