Randomness of LaLa

There is so much going on in my mind today... whoosh.....

so to warn you this maybe a little random :) You forgive me though right?

I need to seriously do a post on the 4th! I have pics and vids to share :) I will try to work on that tonight and hopefully get it posted for tomorrow or at least Saturday LOL - forgiven again?? 

First, I'm seriously loving Professor Sheldon (seriously that's his name). I feel actually privileged to have such a brilliant person to be teaching me. He has studied under some very impressive people and is impressive in his own right. Even though he does go the ENTIRE 4hours of class I feel like I'm really learning. Classes like this make me love being in school. Does anyone remember these??

Dr Sheldon loves his transparencies!

I've been thinking about the baby.  And no I haven't mentioned much of it for the simple fact I don't want my blog to be all sad. And I'm not sad all the time. But I never STOP thinking about her. I feel bad because some things have taken a backseat to this whole ordeal. For instance the (2) blogswaps I'm a part of. But I've been so depressed I just couldn't deal with any of it. I feel much better. These last two weeks have been better.

I was kind of bummed. I signed up to receive a blanket in memory for the baby and the organization told me that they were taking a break and would let me know when they would start again. :( This made me so sad. So I'm thinking about making my own for her. On the 15th it will be two months and just writing that takes my breath.

Josh and I are also going to talk more in depth about trying soon or waiting. The plan was to wait three months after making a plan with the Dr.'s. But now I'm second guessing my decision. Prayer is always appretiated.

My heart is just aching for our child today... it doesn't ever go away. Today it just seems a bit intense.

Until tomorrow

Happy Blogging!

Comments

  1. I always read your blogs. I hate it when your sad. Remember the song "my momma said there'd be days like this, my momma said"... On the bright side, as George Burns said in the God movie...where there is up there is down, west there is east, sad there is happy, where there is good there is bad. So my point is when there is a sad day it just makes us appreciate the happy days that much more. So momma said there'd be days like this but happy days are coming!! Grandma just goes on and on , blah blah blah. LOL! Love you punky

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  2. I've never experienced this type of loss but I know, at least from my perspective, that it's okay to be sad and your friends will always be here to listen to you. It really has only been 2 months since you lost her. The heart needs time to grieve and heal.

    I know I don't need to say this but when you start trying again, that will not ever replace your sweet baby girl. You both seem to have giant hearts and there's always room for more. I pray so hard that you will get the family you want.

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