One year ago today a new season in my life was manifested.
One year ago this morning around 2am we lost our precious baby. Hope would be around 4 months right now had she been meant to stay on this earth.
Even though my heart is broken I feel Gods presence with me today, so strong.
Through many talks and prayers with my God, I made it through these last few days without being devastated.
Through my obiedance I believe God gave more healing to my heart.
Sunday morning was extremely difficult. But I received so much support. Physically, mentally, and spiritually. My sweet friends and family held me hand, rubbed my back, gave me hugs as I stood for the first time as a mom on the stage with the rest of the moms. I can not even begin to describe how much they helped.
I know without their support and God's supernatural strength I wouldn't have made it through.
As I left service I felt a little lighter, a little bit of that dark grief left.
Last night was our women's group. Our topic: Hope.
Who else could have orchestrated these events but God? A study and prayer of Hope the night before I faced the year anniversary of losing our baby.
A couple of my sisters prayed with me. Their prayers and words were strong and challenging. But also encouraging.
This morning I woke up with a lightness and true HOPE in Christ! There was no heaviness, and I know that is because of the prayers that are being lifted up for us and I know its God's presence sticking with me today.
Is my heart still missing our child, of course. But today I stand thankful...
Thankful that ...
Hope is never going to cry
Hope is never to be sick
Hope never knew darkness
Hope will ALWAYS know Jesus...
God is so good to me. He loves me so much. As I write this with tears pouring I must tell you what he did for me this morning...
As I was walking up to the entrance at my job I heard some one say
"Excuse me, Hey"
I turned around and there was a bus driver sitting there in her bus and reading her little tattered black bible.
I have never talked to this lady one time.
She says: "As I watched you walked up the sidewalk here I heard God tell me to tell you something. I don't know if you have been praying to God or what is going on. But he loves you. And he is going to give you what you have prayed for. He just love you so much. He wants you to know it is well."
She then quoted a scripture to me:
But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
I told her what today was. She got up and hugged me pleading Jesus over me.
I am so in awe of God. He is a God of everything but he made sure that I was given HOPE on a day I might have been hopeless. He was concerned and loved me so much, ME? Lauren in east Tennessee...
He loves me. And I know today, my heart was healed again.
Thank you Lord for your presence!! Thank you for your obedient servants!
I am simply in awe of him...