Awkward

I wonder if people realized how clumsy or awkward I am? 

I'm a pretty confident person and I'm pretty comfortable with myself. 

Occasionally the insecurity will creep up. I feel out of place and different. 

For instance here are a few awkward or clumsy things about my self...

~ I laugh at the most inappropriate times. I have done this since I was a kids. I chuckle, its a deep throaty chuckle too! Ok, maybe not deep or that throaty... Anyway like yesterday as I am sitting listening to the dangers of my FIL's surgery I start to chuckle at random things the Dr says.  Oh boy...

~ When I'm at the grocery store and someone is coming at me in the same direction I get over as soon as they do then we both go back and forth... I can't stay still. I over correct only to make a really awkward encounter. 

~Oh the plethora of stories I could tell you of me slipping, tripping, diving to the floor, and falling on my butt! Ones of tripping at a gas station right in front of the boy I was currently in-love with at 14

 to

 me lifting up a table with my BELLY in front of about 100+ police officers graduating my first year in college then it slamming down hard making the entire foyer echo

 to 

last week slipping in front of the entire food court at the mall while my grandmother who isn't even half my size tried to catch me... see what I mean?

There are a few reasons I think I do this... 

1. I'm just not what you call "graceful"... I shuffle my feet and do not watch where I am walking

2. I'm in thought. There are times when there is so much going on and my mind is on a roller coaster. 

3. I chuckle because I'm awkward...When I'm feeling an extreme emotion whatever it is I'm crying or chuckling...

On a positive note.. J thinks I'm cute. God made me who I am. At least my emotions are coming out... that means I am trying to get away from my "Pushdownism" (Click to see definition)

But hey, this is me, Aunt Lala :)

In the words of one of my 17 yr old students when he told me he didn't need any training for a job...

"Because, hey, I'm me" 

Happy Blogging!