Shy to Not So Much

From a young age behind my smile was a very anxious, shy, not a very confident person. I was so insecure about myself that I never wanted to talk in front of others except for children.

There were some struggles for me as a teenager. I was one of those kids who from a young age followed Christ. My moral compass was extremely high for a young person. Unfortunately the young people who were around me did not share my views, and the friends of mine that did lived in another state.

Being an outcast or unaccepted by your peers can leave a damaging affect. Middle school I was made fun of often. Youth group at church was no better as I entered my later teen years. I was OK for a shoulder to cry on or to gain advice. When one of my friends decided to bump up their morals for a time then I was fine to "hang" with.  This peer rejection stayed with me, and then I had my heart broken by someone for some of the same reasons. I was not willing to compromise  my beliefs or morals.

At 19 I decided that I was going to do what I had to do. I got my GED, took my ACT, applied for college. For someone who is insecure and has anxiety this was a big deal. It was time for me to start living life for me and be who God wanted.

That is when I began to change. I became more confident (a little). My self-esteem was still pretty low. But I tried focusing on making my life my own with or without being single or in a relationship.

Fast forward a couple years... I had found some great friends through school and work. I was really just loving my life. Then I met Josh.

As you know we have had a wondrous love affair (You can read it HERE). When he met me my heart was still pretty bruised by had came back together.

This week in training I noticed something about myself that I've been noticing ALOT sense changing jobs especially.

I was confident. I spoke with being anxious. I participated with out caring what people thought. I no longer follow, but I'm leading. I'm not concerned with pleasing anyone except God. Not family. Not friends. Not co-workers. Not even Josh. 

My concern is to be the woman that God has planned me to be. But I'm not living for others. I'm living for him.

There is a point to all of this... I promise.

First, don't wait on people to accept you. Do not try and please them. God has a specific plan just for you!! His plan not theirs! Start living today! If you need a boost feel free to message me on facebook or my email. Please don't wait one more second.


Josh has influenced my confidence and my self-esteem in so many ways.

1. He respects me - values, morals, beliefs, and all. Not once did ridicule me or look down on me because of them.

2. He goes over and beyond to make sure I felt beautiful from day one. He communicates his attraction to my personality and to me physically.

3. He stands behind my goals and dreams.

4. He has NEVER tried to change me. He fell in love with me. :)

Again, I encourage you. If your hurting because of what people thought or think of you. Don't let it hinder you... move forward. This was not an easy process... And I didn't get here over night. But I would love to share with you how.

 

Until Next time,