Starting last Monday this week was a complete roller coaster. Not sure if I could ever explain to anyone how painful it has been. I've struggled with if I should write about my experience. To write about something so close to you can make you seem so vulnerable. Writing has always helped me. I've kept a journal since I was nine. I've always been very analytical with my feelings and things going on around me. Which is why I have a journal, a prayer journal, and a blog :) Crazy, I know. I usually don't have much time to write in any of them, but the blog. I wonder how many women suffer silently because of what this one even does to us emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I don't want to suffer alone. I needed to know that what I'm feeling is normal. Even though people can be very sympathetic, some seem like it is no big deal. It was a big deal. And every second with the Lords help I'm making it. Last Monday night I had a miscarriage. Even as I type ...
Ok, I'm hooked to this blog! Megan is such a sweetheart! You should check her out! Sometimes ... I love an overflowing amount of ketchup Always. .. Have some sort of condiment Sometimes. .. (courtesy of the hubby) Act like I hate Pixel Always ...Truly love her (I apparently in his words "Don't fool anybody") Sometimes ... I can down and eat a whole thing of pringles bbq chips Always ... Eat at least 1/2 the can (They are addicting!) Sometimes. .. I LOVE to sit outside Always ... Hate the bugs that come along with sitting outside Sometimes ... I enjoy being in college Always ... Am counting down the days until I graduate! Speaking of college I need to get back to the studying! Class tonight! Geography class #2! Happy Blogging!!
One year ago today a new season in my life was manifested. One year ago this morning around 2am we lost our precious baby. Hope would be around 4 months right now had she been meant to stay on this earth. Even though my heart is broken I feel Gods presence with me today, so strong. Through many talks and prayers with my God, I made it through these last few days without being devastated. Through my obiedance I believe God gave more healing to my heart. Sunday morning was extremely difficult. But I received so much support. Physically, mentally, and spiritually. My sweet friends and family held me hand, rubbed my back, gave me hugs as I stood for the first time as a mom on the stage with the rest of the moms. I can not even begin to describe how much they helped. I know without their support and God's supernatural strength I wouldn't have made it through. As I left service I felt a little lighter, a little bit of that dark grief left. Last night was our women...
Awww, happy anniversary! Here's to a lifetime more of these celebrations!
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