Did not think I would ever write this...

I have a draft that I was working on at the end of January.

I had every intention of filling my blog with with a post at least once a week. I had some drafts put together.

At the end of January, our lives kind of took a crazy turn. One in which I was not expecting. 

(long post ahead...)

Little did we know this crazy turn would be an up and down emotional roller coaster.

I was feeling pretty tired and sensitive, normal for me when getting close to "that" time. 

I was talking to my sister and realized that I was late. About a week late. Which since having Ethan only happened once... When I was pregnant with Little Bit. 

I bought a pack of two, went home. Did the test let it sit, the one line that always shows up quickly showed... So I sat it down. 

Told myself it's not time, it may never be time. That's okay. We can adopt. My normal pep talk I give myself after every negative test. 

I waited the appropriate time, gathered the trash and looked back at the stick ready to throw it away. 

Then I seen it. Another line showed up! It was positive. I was shocked. Completely blown away.

I took this around four and Josh did not get home that until almost 11.

He walked in and Ethan gave him a card.

"Daddy, I'm going to be a big brother!" and drew an ostrich (his choice) pregnant.

I love my little random pre-schooler.

The next day we went to the Dr to get a confirmation on the pregnancy and to check my progesterone levels immediately and ran test for blood clotting disorders. They also told us that it would be until Monday when we could find out results (Four days away)

I was pretty nervous and scared. I was excited too. It was an emotional roller coaster. 

I called two days later hoping they at least had my progesterone test back. They didn't. I was so upset. 

Needing reassurance was over riding any kind of logic. 

Monday morning came, no call. So I called. (Smile) 

They didn't have either test. She reassured me that it would probably be in the morning. They wouldn't call until after lunch. 

Tuesday came and they finally called. 

My progesterone levels were on the low side but in her words "Not in the danger zone" and the next day they called with my test results for the blood clotting disorders. 

There was an abnormality. Instead of waiting for the month we were going to have to wait, they wanted to see me asap. 

A couple days later we were at a new OBGYN and getting an ultrasound. 

*sigh* It was interesting. 

They seen two sacs...and they were empty. My progesterone was up and everything was still showing I was pregnant. As we left we felt odd. 

We were having twins or we had something called Blithe Ovum. Two of them actually.

They had us come back in three days. They seen a yoke sac in one sac, the other still nothing. The yoke sac was assymetrical and they were still afraid to give me any hope

We came back three days later… and finally something.

We seen a baby. It was measuring almost 5weeks. And had moved to a better position.

Unfortunately in one of the sacs there was still was nothing. We had a vanishing twin.

In all honesty I have not been mournful over that aspect. I guess because there was not a baby, and I did not feel a loss. It is disappointing but I'm thankful for our baby that is thriving.

After that appointment we came back at almost 6 weeks, and there was a heartbeat. A HEARTBEAT!!

It was the best little blip I had ever seen!

We have seen the Dr. quiet often and I am now only seeing a high risk office. They are taking great care of me. God has went before me each and every time and provided along the way! Resting in him as we know that I will deliver at the latest 39 weeks. So this little baby will be debuting end of September!

This has been a very difficult, exciting, anxious, and a blessed time. We have made it to the second trimester. And will be finding out the gender in about three weeks. I will make other post with more updates.

Without further ado here is Peanut <3

This pregnancy has been an adventure already. And trust me… I have plenty to say on the hormone roller coaster I've been on… pregnancy rage is a real problem people.

J and I are thrilled and cannot wait to meet this baby at the end of September! And more excited to see E as a big brother! Another miracle... 

We appreciate all your prayers!